THE OFFICIAL NEWSLETTER OF THE MA COMMONWEALTH DIVISION
"E Plurbis Kickballicum"
"E Plurbis Kickballicum"
FOURTH OF JULY SPECTACULAR WEEK: "Cannot conversations cull united nations? If you got the patience, celebrate the ancients. Columbia! ” - Sufjan Stevens
Table of Contents:
I: How could someone not have written a song called “Party in the USA” before Miley Cyrus? Gah.II: Baseball, Ford, Apple Pie and Your Mom
III: Amber Waves of Kickballs
IV: The Fruited Plains of Lowell Playground
V: Schedule and Standings
VI: Announcements
VII: America - Fuck Yeah!
VI: Announcements
VII: America - Fuck Yeah!
PART I: "California...knows how to party. In the city of L.A. In the city of good ol' Watts. In the city, the city of Compton. We keep it rockin! We keep it rockin!” - 2Pac featuring Dr. Dre
The 3/4th Season Party is almost here! Here are the details.
Where: An Tua Nua - 835 Beacon Street - Boston
When: Friday July 9th
What Time: 8pm-11pm
Who: You (For Free) - Your Non-League Member Guest ($10)
Why: Free Drinks. Finger Food. Kickball Awesomeness. Raise Money for Charity. Fun. Face Melting Good Time. The Usual.
What Time: 8pm-11pm
Who: You (For Free) - Your Non-League Member Guest ($10)
Why: Free Drinks. Finger Food. Kickball Awesomeness. Raise Money for Charity. Fun. Face Melting Good Time. The Usual.
PART II: “All my powers of expression and thoughts so sublime, Could never do you justice in reason or rhyme. Only one thing I did wrong stayed in Mississippi a day too long.” - Bob Dylan
Despite the opinions of some in this nation, the strength of the United States is not the homogenity of a particular race, or singularity of some particular creed or philosophy, but the diversity of her people, working, living and playing together to form that more perfect union.
So to celebrate our greatest strength (and my discovering of the "collage" option on the latest version of Picasa) here's a collage of just how awesome our league is.
PART III: "And Jesus just said hey i still love you Judas, since you've been up in Massachusetts. I've been dreaming about Dos Cruces, and I’ve been thinking about both crosses.” - The Hold Steady
6:30pm Games:
CareScout 6 over Looking to Score 2
A rematch of the top two teams in the league ended similarly as CareScout was able to defeat Looking to Score by a 6 to 2 margin.
Allen Club 5 ties Kicked to the Curb 5
For those of you who assiduously followed the first round of the World Cup, playing for the “tie” in many cases an optimum strategy. Of course this is probably one of the reasons why soccer is a passing fancy in the United States. How can you take seriously a sport where a game can end and no one wins? (Also, how can you take seriously a sport that can’t even get goal calls right? But that’s a digression for another newsletter). Still as a point of strategery, there is something to be said about a tie, especially if it is an entertaining tie.
That is what definitely occurred in the battle of Allen Club and Kicked to the Curb Part II: The Hunt for Caddigan’s Shoe. The game saw each team get a lead, lose a lead and then finally both (neither?) agree and just go home with
That is what definitely occurred in the battle of Allen Club and Kicked to the Curb Part II: The Hunt for Caddigan’s Shoe. The game saw each team get a lead, lose a lead and then finally both (neither?) agree and just go home with
everyone getting a point.
While injuries limited the efforts of stars Scoville the Red (gross toe) and Kina (hamstring), Doctor & Realtor, Allen Club still put up a fight. A 1-3 effort by Country Boy Allen didn't support the great kicking by his team, Coach did his best to support the team with a Speedy Gonzalez approach to the outfield. King Kingsley contributed with solid pitching in the first two innings and some strong kicking and base running. Budweiser Brendan, ran hard throughout the game, even attempting one base too many, like he normally does with his brewskis at night. Big Bad Barry used his Loch Ness to consistently abused the kickball and even contributed with some strong first base play. The Legend that is Anita continues to impress everyone who has ever played
kickball with her goddess like outfield play. Anna Mae, continually bad ass, approached her multiple hit game like it was just another day. Margarita Steve put a show in the outfield that would be on Sports Center if it wasn't for Anita sharing the same outfield. Over the Top Casey and Sarah, of Isaac's Moving, made sure anyone attempting to get to a base felt the wrath of their emotions. Matty Big Balls even pulled off a Double Play! Ohhhh, that reminds me...starting July 5th, visit your local Papa Gino's for your own Double Play - Two Large Cheese Pizzas for $17.99!For Kicked to the Curb, the back and forth flow to the game was a victory of sorts, especially after their defeat to the Allen Club the week previous. Allen Club took the lead early, and then Philippe M hit a 2 run triple to make it 3-2 in the 3rd . KTTC then had a couple of good plays in the outfield by John S and; Matt B and a Michael Jordan style catch by Leedum as pitcher. The game ended up with a 5-5 tie when Chica hit a single to drive Sarah J into score in the last inning.
Joshua A and Sarah J. contributed to this report.
PART IV: “It blowed away, it blowed away. My Oklahoma home, it blowed away. It looked so green and fair when I built my shanty there. But my Oklahoma home, it blowed away.” - Pete Seeger
7:15 Games
Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas 6 over Ball Busters 0
MYSTERY SOLVED: Ninjas Bust Balls
Dateline, Waltham Mass. Mystery Week opponent Ball Busters fell by way of the Ninja, 6-0. A good game all around, especially by the Ninja defense and delicious bundt cakes for most. Ed took home the sword for his blatant disregard for knowing the number of outs as well as his and his teammates physically well being. Nice slide though. Team Captain Paul took home the medallion for kicking a home run and spending the rest of the inning catching his breath. The Ninjas now look forward to their next game against, what the hell, the Ball Busters again? That doesn't make any freakin' sense. Who ever made this schedule should be taken out...
... to dinner, because he's so smart and handsome. (edit note: This statement does not reflect the opinion of the GMOT Editorial Board, it’s sponsors, subsidiares, affiliates or anyone tangentially related thereof and therein. It is solely the opinion of the writer, and should not be taken as statement of fact, but more for entertainment educations and ecumenical purposes only at the sole risk and discretion of the you the reader, ipso facto in perpetuity ad infinitum no stealing fizzy lifting drink.)
Side Rant: Rain, Rain, Go to HELL.
... to dinner, because he's so smart and handsome. (edit note: This statement does not reflect the opinion of the GMOT Editorial Board, it’s sponsors, subsidiares, affiliates or anyone tangentially related thereof and therein. It is solely the opinion of the writer, and should not be taken as statement of fact, but more for entertainment educations and ecumenical purposes only at the sole risk and discretion of the you the reader, ipso facto in perpetuity ad infinitum no stealing fizzy lifting drink.)
Side Rant: Rain, Rain, Go to HELL.
It's not just that it rains every dang Thursday. It's that it rains every Thursday between 4:00 and 6:00, just in time for most of us to be already driving to our games. Were the fields built on an ancient Indian burial ground which needs to be ritually cleansed each week prior to kicking a ball? Do you hear me Mother Nature? If it doesn't rain on Thursday, please thank me. If it does rain on Thursday, please join me on the dirt field pitchers mount to curse the heavens at 6:15 pm.
As for the Ball Busters, the triumphant return of Captain “Shoeless” Tom Caddigan, went over about as well as David Caruso’s movie acting career. (Wow. That’s effing dated). The Ball Busters were busted, and there’s wasn’t much to highlight. Thankfully the schedulemaker has the Ball Busters and Ninjas matching up this week, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned about the Ball Busters (besides their flip cup prowess and fondness for stadium rock to play during at bats) is they rarely lose to a team more than once.
Paul L and Tom C contributed to this report
Shenanigans 5 over Wakademia Nuts 2
As for the Ball Busters, the triumphant return of Captain “Shoeless” Tom Caddigan, went over about as well as David Caruso’s movie acting career. (Wow. That’s effing dated). The Ball Busters were busted, and there’s wasn’t much to highlight. Thankfully the schedulemaker has the Ball Busters and Ninjas matching up this week, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned about the Ball Busters (besides their flip cup prowess and fondness for stadium rock to play during at bats) is they rarely lose to a team more than once.
Paul L and Tom C contributed to this report
Shenanigans 5 over Wakademia Nuts 2
The Wakadamia Nuts bid for their first win of the year was a close one but the Nuts came up short. After two scoreless innings, Shenanigans scored 4 runs in the top of the 3rd and took the early lead. The Nuts began a comeback with singles in the home half of the frame by Caitlin, Justin (2-2 on the day), Jon R., Maureen and AJ to score 2 runs. Jon B. and Milia, along with solid pitching, would also get on base later in the game.
Ever the optimists, the Nuts know that they are playing better and the games are getting closer, and they should break on through to the other side soon.
For Shenanigans, despite the absence of their captain Kelly, the offense which had been dormant for most of the season finally was able to awake. In the third the combination of solid kicking and base running by Dan, O’Toole, Alex, Kate, Jeff, Juan, Jad and Pat got runs on the board. This outburst proved to be enough as the defense lead by Laurie’s pitching, and plays by Kat, Alex and Olivia kept the Nuts roasted. Dan made a game clinching double play to end the game, getting the Shenanigans into the win column.
Adam and Dan contributed to this report.
PART V:"Dreams come true, In blue Hawaii, And mine could all come true, this magic night of nights with you.” - Elvis
Ever the optimists, the Nuts know that they are playing better and the games are getting closer, and they should break on through to the other side soon.
For Shenanigans, despite the absence of their captain Kelly, the offense which had been dormant for most of the season finally was able to awake. In the third the combination of solid kicking and base running by Dan, O’Toole, Alex, Kate, Jeff, Juan, Jad and Pat got runs on the board. This outburst proved to be enough as the defense lead by Laurie’s pitching, and plays by Kat, Alex and Olivia kept the Nuts roasted. Dan made a game clinching double play to end the game, getting the Shenanigans into the win column.
Adam and Dan contributed to this report.
PART V:"Dreams come true, In blue Hawaii, And mine could all come true, this magic night of nights with you.” - Elvis
Standings after 5 Weeks:
(Win, Loss, Tie, Forfeit, Winning Percentage, Runs Allowed, Runs Scored)
1.) Care Scout 5 0 0 0 1.00% 9 25
2.) Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas 4 1 0 0 0.80% 7 27
3.) Looking to Score 3 2 0 0 0.60% 12 21
4.) Ball Busters 3 2 0 0 0.60% 15 24
5.) Allen Club 2 1 1 1 0.35% 21 16
6.) Shenanigans 1 4 0 0 0.20% 22 11
7.) Kicked to the Curb 1 2 1 1 0.15% 30 21
8.) Wakademia Nuts 0 5 0 0 0.00% 40 12
Week 6 Schedule:
6:30pm
Diamond:
Kicked to the Curb v. Shenanigans
Umps - Looking to Score
Grass:
Wakademia Nuts v. Care Scout
Umps - Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas
7:15pm
Diamond:
Allen Club v. Looking to Score
Umps - Shenanigans
Grass:
Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas v. Ball Busters
Umps - Wakademia Nuts
PART VI: "Mama, let's put this body underneath the trees and put Daddy in the truck and head to Tennessee" Just then, his little brother came in holding the milk man's hat and a bottle of gin singing, La la la la, la la la la, yeah.” - The Raconteurs
Announcements, Announcements, Announcements:
(Win, Loss, Tie, Forfeit, Winning Percentage, Runs Allowed, Runs Scored)
1.) Care Scout 5 0 0 0 1.00% 9 25
2.) Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas 4 1 0 0 0.80% 7 27
3.) Looking to Score 3 2 0 0 0.60% 12 21
4.) Ball Busters 3 2 0 0 0.60% 15 24
5.) Allen Club 2 1 1 1 0.35% 21 16
6.) Shenanigans 1 4 0 0 0.20% 22 11
7.) Kicked to the Curb 1 2 1 1 0.15% 30 21
8.) Wakademia Nuts 0 5 0 0 0.00% 40 12
Week 6 Schedule:
6:30pm
Diamond:
Kicked to the Curb v. Shenanigans
Umps - Looking to Score
Grass:
Wakademia Nuts v. Care Scout
Umps - Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas
7:15pm
Diamond:
Allen Club v. Looking to Score
Umps - Shenanigans
Grass:
Wicked Awesome Helicopter Ninjas v. Ball Busters
Umps - Wakademia Nuts
PART VI: "Mama, let's put this body underneath the trees and put Daddy in the truck and head to Tennessee" Just then, his little brother came in holding the milk man's hat and a bottle of gin singing, La la la la, la la la la, yeah.” - The Raconteurs
Announcements, Announcements, Announcements:
WEATHER: SHHH. Say no more.
FOOTWEAR: Many league members have adopted wearing cleats to games, considering the wet and grassy fields with which we’ve had to deal . Just a reminder that it is explicit in the WAKA rules that metal cleats are not allowed. Any one caught will be asked to change. Repeated offenses that player will be ineligible. Plastic cleats are still perfectly fine.
BOCA BAR: A great night at the Boca Bar was had last week. Time to step it up a notch as we get ready for the 3/4 Season Party. Where are the celebratory team colored shots? I miss those.
FOOTWEAR: Many league members have adopted wearing cleats to games, considering the wet and grassy fields with which we’ve had to deal . Just a reminder that it is explicit in the WAKA rules that metal cleats are not allowed. Any one caught will be asked to change. Repeated offenses that player will be ineligible. Plastic cleats are still perfectly fine.
BOCA BAR: A great night at the Boca Bar was had last week. Time to step it up a notch as we get ready for the 3/4 Season Party. Where are the celebratory team colored shots? I miss those.
PICTURES: Thank you to those who have submitted photos. I think they are what make this newletters the most appealing one in all of the artificial kickball universe. If you have any to contribute feel free to email them to me at this address.
PART VII:"In the squares of the city - In the shadow of the steeple Near the relief office - I see my people And some are grumblin' and some are wonderin' If this land's still made for you and me. This land is your land, this land is my land From California, to the New York Island. ” - Woody Guthrie
Two hundred and thirty four years ago a bunch of folks banded together under one common theme, to start a grand experiment in governance. Now it can be argued the motives of those involved, from privileged elites simply seeking out their own best economic self interests, educated liberals looking to put in practice enlightened thought, or agnostic deists wanting to live in a world ruled by reasona and not mythical superstition, but what is clear is the results. A new nation was born, freedoms were set down on paper (if not yet in practice) and the good Old USof A was born. So let us celebrate the freedom our national forebears won for us (whether our families arrived back then or decades later), play some kickball, and then have a safe and patriotic 4th of July weekend.
- David, GMOT Editor, Team Shenanigans
