The Award Winning Official Newsletter of the MA Commonwealth Division
"Why'd you let him play kickball?" - Det. Jimmy McNulty "Go to. It's America, man"
WEEK 4: "I wanna run like the lions. Released from the cages. Released from the rages burning in my soul tonight, I am a patriot, I love my country" - Steven Van Zandt
Table of Contents:
I: The Kickball's Red Glare
II: No need to dress up as Native Americans or misread the Constitution at this Party
III: Recaps
IV: Schedule and Standings
V: Announcements
VI: Team America
PART I: "It's coming to America first, the cradle of the best and of the worst. It's here they got the range, and the machinery for change and it's here they got the spiritual thirst." - Leonard Cohen
This past Monday, this grand experiment of democracy that we call the United States of America, celebrated its 235th birthday. We take the 4th of July seriously here in the MA
Commonwealth Division. We understand and appreciate the opportunities that our home, our nation, affords us, that we can spend time not living in fear of war, or invasion, but can live in peace playing kickball. Despite all the flaws, troubles, and dour predictions manipulated for short term political game, The United States is still awesome, will be awesome, and is second to none in the world. (Well except maybe behind Finland, which according to noted historian and broadway producer Monty Python, "has it all.")
So to honor America, as our fingers heal, eyebrows grow back, and cholesterol and blood alcohol levels decrease, here is our Kickball National Anthem.
Oh say can you see, kickballs bouncing at night
That are so forcefully kicked, while teammates are screaming
Whose red balls and allstars, and dusty summer nights
O'er grassy base paths, of kickball glory we're dreaming
And the bouncy red ball, Kramer homers in the air
Gave proof through the night, our youth still somewhat there;
Oh say does that red kickball, fly o'er fields where we play
In the land of the free, and the home of the brave?
PART II: "Ain't there one damn song that can make me break down and cry? All nightI want the young American." - David Bowie
Holy crap! It's gonna be nice today and we'll actually play games.
Holy holy crap crap! It's time for the Mid Season Party.
This annual bacchanalia of Kickabrigian awesomeness will take place
THIS SATURDAY
Union Street Restaurant
170R Union Street
Newton, MA
Come one. Come all!
PART III: "America, fast cars. America, the girls, the bars.America, don't make no fuss. America, get on the bus." - Motorhead (I can never find and umlaut when I need one)
6:30 PM Games
Ball Busters 3 over Ninja Awesomenauts 1
An kickball fueled rocket carrying nineteen Awesomenauts was destroyed shortly after liftoff from Waltham's dirt field last Thursday against the Ball Busters. No injuries or property damage were immediately reported, but the match up was a struggle and ended in a 3-1 defeat. The exact launch time was 6:31 p.m. EDT. The anomaly that caused the failure occurred approximately 27 seconds into the first inning and was named "Shoeless" Tom Caddigan.
Many Ninja-nauts blame the loss on non-captain Paul provoking the Busters with an interview in the Waltham press, calling out their opponents for all to see.Most debris from the article is thought to have fallen in the Ball Buster g-mail chain. However, there are conflicting reports of debris being on the team bench in the form of yelling and shouting.
Depsite the loss, fine performances were put in by Kyla and Ryan, earning joint MVP awards. NASA is very disappointed in this failure but has directed its focus on success and conducting a comprehensive investigation to identify the root cause of the defeat. One thing is for sure, the Ninja-Buster rivalry is heating up with several back and forth games over the last few seasons. Huzzah.
As for the Ball Busters, the game plan was simple. Wanting to eliminate the bunt, Tom pitched like a jerk. But the Ball Busters were able shut down NASA with interstellar defense (namely Beth and Lindsey) and timely kicking. We put up two runs in the first (Dan A and Jordan) and got another insurance run in the third (Marty - in his first game too!). It got a little hairy (except for Tom) in the fifth, but John C was able to pull in the VERY HIGH pop up to seal the victory.
Ball Busters 3 over Ninja Awesomenauts 1
An kickball fueled rocket carrying nineteen Awesomenauts was destroyed shortly after liftoff from Waltham's dirt field last Thursday against the Ball Busters. No injuries or property damage were immediately reported, but the match up was a struggle and ended in a 3-1 defeat. The exact launch time was 6:31 p.m. EDT. The anomaly that caused the failure occurred approximately 27 seconds into the first inning and was named "Shoeless" Tom Caddigan.Many Ninja-nauts blame the loss on non-captain Paul provoking the Busters with an interview in the Waltham press, calling out their opponents for all to see.Most debris from the article is thought to have fallen in the Ball Buster g-mail chain. However, there are conflicting reports of debris being on the team bench in the form of yelling and shouting.
Depsite the loss, fine performances were put in by Kyla and Ryan, earning joint MVP awards. NASA is very disappointed in this failure but has directed its focus on success and conducting a comprehensive investigation to identify the root cause of the defeat. One thing is for sure, the Ninja-Buster rivalry is heating up with several back and forth games over the last few seasons. Huzzah.
As for the Ball Busters, the game plan was simple. Wanting to eliminate the bunt, Tom pitched like a jerk. But the Ball Busters were able shut down NASA with interstellar defense (namely Beth and Lindsey) and timely kicking. We put up two runs in the first (Dan A and Jordan) and got another insurance run in the third (Marty - in his first game too!). It got a little hairy (except for Tom) in the fifth, but John C was able to pull in the VERY HIGH pop up to seal the victory.
Paul and Tom contributed to this report.
One Kick Wonders 15 over WAKA Flocka Flame 0
In a rout, One Kick Wonders got their first win of the season.
7:15 PM Games
Looking to Score 5 over The Boston Kreamers 2
After falling behind 1-0 in the top of the first, LTS answered in the bottom frame with a
Mike C single scoring Chris and a Jay K single scoring Ben K.
It stayed 2-1 until the bottom of the 3rd when Ben K helped his own cause with a 3 run homer that scored Dom and Alina.
Solid D at third by Chris and shortstop by Leland helped preserve the 5-2 win.
For the Kreamers, the MVP this week goes out to Kevin “Tuna” H. Tuna nailed a line drive to the outfield to kick a triple and was kicked in to home by Patrick N. Tuna also had an amazing sitting catch from left field to end the 4thinning. Our pitcher, Ryan L, had a few tricks up his sleeves (or gloves), but it wasn’t enough to hold off Looking to Score. Final
7:15 PM Games
Looking to Score 5 over The Boston Kreamers 2
After falling behind 1-0 in the top of the first, LTS answered in the bottom frame with a
Mike C single scoring Chris and a Jay K single scoring Ben K.It stayed 2-1 until the bottom of the 3rd when Ben K helped his own cause with a 3 run homer that scored Dom and Alina.
Solid D at third by Chris and shortstop by Leland helped preserve the 5-2 win.
For the Kreamers, the MVP this week goes out to Kevin “Tuna” H. Tuna nailed a line drive to the outfield to kick a triple and was kicked in to home by Patrick N. Tuna also had an amazing sitting catch from left field to end the 4thinning. Our pitcher, Ryan L, had a few tricks up his sleeves (or gloves), but it wasn’t enough to hold off Looking to Score. Final
Meghan and Jason contributed to this report.
99 Problems 9 over Pitch Please! 7
After Pitch Please jumped out to a 3-0 lead, 99 problems bounced back with 2 runs in the bottom of the 2nd, despite the shock following a very vicous collision between star
3rdbaseman Andrew and the team’s best catcher Gabe (get well guys). Trailing 4-2 after the top of the 3rd, 99 problems bounced back with 5 runs thanks to Jeremy’s RBI single that scored Josh, Mark’s 2 run double which scored Vickie and Gabe, and Erin’s 2 run homerun that scored Mark. After Pitch Please cut the lead to 7-5 after the top of the 4th inning, Brett came through with a huge 2-run double, that proved to be the difference maker.
99 Problems got strong defensive efforts out of Vickie (who’s face plant in short left showed that she’s brings it every game and is willing to lay out on any given play) Gabe, Andrew, Alex, and most importantly Brett, who’s over the shoulder catch in deep center with 2 men on kept the score close in the early going.
99 Problems 9 over Pitch Please! 7
After Pitch Please jumped out to a 3-0 lead, 99 problems bounced back with 2 runs in the bottom of the 2nd, despite the shock following a very vicous collision between star
3rdbaseman Andrew and the team’s best catcher Gabe (get well guys). Trailing 4-2 after the top of the 3rd, 99 problems bounced back with 5 runs thanks to Jeremy’s RBI single that scored Josh, Mark’s 2 run double which scored Vickie and Gabe, and Erin’s 2 run homerun that scored Mark. After Pitch Please cut the lead to 7-5 after the top of the 4th inning, Brett came through with a huge 2-run double, that proved to be the difference maker.
99 Problems got strong defensive efforts out of Vickie (who’s face plant in short left showed that she’s brings it every game and is willing to lay out on any given play) Gabe, Andrew, Alex, and most importantly Brett, who’s over the shoulder catch in deep center with 2 men on kept the score close in the early going.
Vickie contributed to this report.
PART IV: "La la la la la he wants to go to magic america. La la la la la he'd like to live in magic america. With all the magic people." - Blur
Standings:
Schedule Week 4: Thursday, July 7
6:30 PM
Mud Dirt: Ninja Awesomenauts v. The Boston Kreamers
Referees: Looking to Score
Grass: Pitch Please! v. WAKA Flocka Flame
Referees: 99 Problems
7:15 PM
Referees: Ninja Awesomenauts
Grass: 99 Problems v. Looking to Score
Referees:WAKA Flocka Flame
Equipment:Looking to Score
PART IV: "There are nights when I think that Sal Paradise was right. Boys and girls in America, they have such a sad time together. Sucking off each other at the demonstrations, making sure their makeup's straight. Crushing one another with colossal expectations, dependent, undisciplined, sleeping late." - The Hold Steady
Announcements, Announcements Announcements
TWITTER: Follow the league twitter account for all you twatters out there. Get the latest news and information about the MA Commonwealth Division (including stuff about rivalry week) from our twitter feed. Follow us @macommonwealth
BOCA BAR: Wet your whistle at our league sponsor. And try the plaintains! And remember always drink responsibly and to reiterate Paul, please respect our hosts and avoid outside beer, as tempting, delicious and innocent it may seem.
WEATHER: All systems GO, again. Thank you to whomever sacrificed a loved one or small ugly animal to the weathergirls, gods.
PART IV: "What is this land America so many travel there. I'm going now while I'm still young my darling meet me there. Wish me luck my lovely I'll send for you when I can. And we'll make our home in the American land." -Bruce Springsteen
WEATHER: All systems GO, again. Thank you to whomever sacrificed a loved one or small ugly animal to the weather
PART IV: "What is this land America so many travel there. I'm going now while I'm still young my darling meet me there. Wish me luck my lovely I'll send for you when I can. And we'll make our home in the American land." -Bruce Springsteen
The same is true for the United States. Despite what a small, but highly vocal and misguided minority think, the United States is a nation of immigrants. Our culture is not tied to one specific racial group, but has evolved, grown and deepened with each and every wave of immigration from the rest of the world. That is our strength and competitive advantage in the world.
Our immigrant past, and present, fuel and shaped the idea of "patriotism" that banal dreck like Lee Greenwood exploit. Each successive immigrant waves, whether out of gratitude for the opportunities that the US offers, our sheer celebration for not being wherever they were, or as attempts to assimilate and minimize the hatred from the population already here, have all been vigorous in adopting and acknowledging our national myths, symbols, and history. Just watch The Godfather (especially the opening monologue) to get a pop culture feel for immigration into the idea of "America."
It is the strength of everyone working together that makes winning possible, whether within the small scale of a kickball team, or on the large scale of an entire country. We're all on the best team in the world. Team America. Fuck yeah!
Good luck and Happy Kicking.
- David, GMOT Editor
- David, GMOT Editor
